Pancakes and Family Dinners
by Fallen Ark Angel
Summary: The first bad decision Laxus made was letting Mirajane cut his hair to begin with. The second one was ever trusting Lisanna not to blab it to the whole world. - One-shot.


Pancakes and Family Dinners

Over the years, Laxus had made a lot of bad decisions. A lot. From trying to take over the guild to a number of women that sobering up he found to be less than pleasing, he'd done it all. But that was the great thing about life. You gotta go through the bad things to get to the good things.

And never before had Laxus had a bad haircut.

Until, of course, Mirajane got involved.

"Why would you waste all that money, Lax?" she asked one day as they sat at the table, eating breakfast.

"It's not that much money to get my hair cut," he told her. "I ain't a woman."

"Yeah, but still. It's just a waste of jewels, don't you think?"

"What? You think that I should grow it out or-"

"Of course not," she told him as he just kept stabbing at his eggs. He'd asked for pancakes, but _no_. The demon didn't feel like making them. "I just think that, you know, I should have a chance to cut it."

"That you should what?"

Mirajane shrugged. "I can, you know. How hard would it be?"

"Mira-'

"Please, dragon?"

"No," he grumbled, giving her a look. "My hair is the hair of a god, you know."

"Laxus-"

"A golden god. And I can't have you mucking it all up."

"I wouldn't!"

"How do I know that? Huh? And what if you-"

"Please, dragon? I won't ask you for nothing else. Not ever."

"That's what you said yesterday when I bought you that new dress."

"And I meant it. Then. Because this thought hadn't occurred to me yet."

"Mirajane. "

"If you really don't think that I'm good enough," she sighed. "I won't do it."

'Thank you."

"I mean, if you really think that."

"I do."

"I cut Elfman's hair, you know."

"I know."

"I just always thought that I was good at it, you know? Cutting hair? That it was one of my many skills. Many, many skills. I-"

"Demon?"

"Uh-huh?"

"If I let you give me a trim, would you shut up?"

"Yep!"

Taking a deep breath, he pushed his plate away. "I'mma need some pancakes-"

"Of course, Laxus." She was quick to take his plate before rushing back over to the stove. "I'll get right on that."

"Thanks," he said, getting up then as he ran a hand through his hair. "I'mma go catch a quick shower, okay?"

"Okay," Mirajane agreed, all perky and happy then. Laxus just went off to go spend some time in the bathroom and, honestly, take in his wondrous hair some more. Before the demon screwed it all up. He just knew that was what would happen.

At the time though, he thought that she'd just get it uneven or something and he could go have it touched up by someone else. Anyone else. Not once did it occur to Laxus that Mira would do _that_ to his hair.

"Mira," he complained at one point. They were in her kitchen as he sat in a chair, her standing behind him and making a rather concerned sigh. "What-"

"Nothing, nothing, Lax. Don't worry about it."

"It's my hair, woman," he growled. "Of course I'm worried about it!"

"I just took a little much off this side, but I'll…um…well…"

"Stop clipping!"

"I'm fixing it, dragon. Hold on."

"Demon-"

"Do you own any nifty hats?"

His tone was dark then. "Mirajane-"

"Maybe I can buy you some. Or at least pick a few out for you to buy. That sounds about ri-"

"I'm gonna kill you."

"Laxus!"

Huffing, he said, "My appearance is everything, Mirajane."

With a frown, she clipped some more. "Just who exactly are you trying to impress here, dragon?"

"No one," he told her. "I just meant-"

More clips. "If you're out trying to pick up women, Laxus-"

"How could I when you're bothering me literally every single day?"

"Oh, I bother you now?"

"You've always bothered me!"

Another clip. Then a snip. And suddenly, Laxus realized that fighting with a woman who was giving you a haircut definitely wasn't the best plan of action. Taking in a breath, he let it out slowly as he tried to find his next words.

"I love you, demon."

"Shut up, Laxus." More cutting. "Just shut up. I- Uh-oh."

"Uh-oh?" Laxus didn't like that sound. At all. "What do you mean by uh-oh? Mirajane?"

"I don't…I mean, you were…and then-"

"Mira," he growled as he tired to get out of the chair. She was quick to lay a hand on his shoulder. "What did you do?"

"Just give me a second," she told him. "I'm trying figure this out."

"What's there to figure out? All I asked you to do was give me a trim, Mirajane. To cut off the dead ends. What have you-"

"A lot of things were going through my mind, alright?" She was going to set the scissors down then, on the kitchen table, before walking off. "Just give me a minute."

"What? Mira-"

"Sit." That was an order. "I'll be right back. I think Elf left some hair gel in the bathroom."

"Gel? Gel, Mira? What? You think that I'm going to use hair gel from, what? Now on? I mean, seriously? You can't honestly think- And you're just walking away. Nice, demon. Leave me to my misery then."

Oh, she was.

Impressing other women. Who did he think he was?

At the moment, a dead man. Or at least he wished he was. Why had he ever let Mirajane touch his hair? Huh? Why?

Love was turning out to be a horrible, terrible thing that made him do stuff that he only regretted.

And, if he was going to be honest, her pancakes had been a tad dry that day. Dry pancakes. In return for ruining his beautiful golden hair.

His demon was something else.

"Okay." Mirajane was back then, carrying a jar. "I found some hair gel and-"

"No. Stay away from me."

"Dragon-"

"No, Mira. You-"

"Sit. Stay."

"Good dog," he finished with a growl.

"Well, I would have said dragon, but here we are."

"Mirajane-"

"Just sit still," she said. "I'll have you all set up in a minute. You're gonna love it. Swear."

"I better," he grumbled. Stupid demon.

He could tell too, as Mirajane was styling it, exactly what she was doing, but honestly, he was just praying that he was wrong.

"Demon?"

"Hmmm?"

"Did you…give me a Mohawk?"

"Mmmmhmm!"

"That's what I thought," he sighed as Mira, done with his hair, went to wash the gel off her hands.

"And it looks lovely."

Taking his chance to escape then, Laxus jumped up from the chair before running off to the bathroom.

"Mirajane!" she heard him growl about then. "What have you done?"

It was…she'd…how could she…

"This is really a turning point, I think," Mira said as she appeared in the bathroom with him, beaming for some reason. She was that deluded. Or demonic. "You can either keep styling it this way, or I can get a razor and really shave off the other sides. I kinda like it this way, I think, because the alternative is so, you know, absolute, but-"

"I hate you." It sounded so pure too as he just stood there, in the tiny bathroom of the Strauss household, staring into the mirror at himself. Or what used to be himself. "I really fucking hate you, Mirajane. You-"

"Laxus-"

"No. Seriously, no. This time, you've done it. You-"

"Why would you say that? You-"

"You ruined my hair! Are you that dense? The hell am I supposed to do with this? Huh, Mira? I can't… I've never been more pissed at you. You're- No, Mira. You're not going to start crying. You're the one that did this. You-"

"Fine, Laxus. You big jerk! Get out then. I hate you too."

Groaning, he turned to look at her. "Mira-"

"No." She ran off too, no doubt to her bedroom, a door slamming not soon after. "Get out, Laxus! All I ever try to do is help you!"

"How was this helping me?" he growled as he headed after her. "Demon-"

"Leave me alone."

"You're acting like I'm the one in the wrong." He tried her bedroom door, but it was locked. "Damn it, Mira, open up. I-"

"No!"

Growling, he turned to stomp off, back to the kitchen.

The hell was he supposed to do now?

* * *

"Uh, Laxus?"

"What?"

"You know, I usually stay out of you and Mira's weird relationship stuff," Lisanna said slowly as she came to a stop in front of her sister's bedroom door. "But…what's going on?"

She'd just gotten home from a job and, really, seeing Laxus over at the house wasn't that out of the ordinary. But seeing him sitting with his back up against Mirajane's bedroom door with a bag over his head was. Even for them.

"Noth-"

"He's a big jerk," Lisanna heard Mirajane call through the door. "And I hate him and we're broken up. You heard that, Laxus?"

Growling, he said, "Fine! You wanna be broken up? Then I'mma go out and fuck-"

"Watch your mouth."

"What difference does it make to you? Huh? I'm not your boyfriend anymore so-"

"Okay, I'm not dealing with this." Lisanna started to walk around him. "Though, Laxus, for the record, putting a plastic bag over your head will suffocate you eventually."

"What?"

"Yeah. Did you seriously not know that?"

"Well, it has gotten a tad harder to breathe-"

"Oh no!" Suddenly, the sound of the door unlocking could be heard before it was thrown open. And Laxus, unprepared for this, fell backwards.

"Ow, Mira," he complained. "What-"

"Are you okay?" She was quick to bend down and pull the bag off his head. "Are you-"

"This is a joke, right?" Lisanna started snickering. "Laxus?"

"Hey!" He tried to grab the bag back from Mirajane. "Give me that!"

"You're gonna suffocate!"

"It's better than this," he growled. "She's laughing at me."

"Lisanna, stop laughing at him. And pointing, really?"

"It's just too funny," her sister got out through giggles. "Who did that to you, Laxus?"

"Who do you think?" He got to his feet slowly. "Your damn sister."

Mira slammed a hand against his arm then, pressing the plastic bag against it. "Suffocate, you big jerk!"

"Demon," he groaned as just as quickly the door was slammed shut and the lock slid in place once more. "Come on. Just-"

"No."

Lisanna, sobering then, asked, "Why did you let her do that to you?"

"Pancakes."

Narrowing her eyes, the younger woman said, "Is that some sorta sex code or-"

"Look," he growled, frowning at her. "I can't leave the house like this. And I don't trust your sister or you to help me out, but there's one solution."

"I'm listening."

"You go and get me Freed, huh? No one else," he said. "He'll shave my head and we'll be good as new."

"Right. You're going to shave your head," she said. "The man that thinks his hair is a gift from the gods."

"It is," he told her. "Before Delilah in there took some clippers to it-"

"Shut up, Laxus! And get out!"

Still just staring at the woman's sister, he said, "But I ain't walking around with it like this."

"Have you tried styling it a different way? Or-"

"Lisanna," he hissed. "Just go get me Freed. And a razor. Alright? No one else."

"Get Freed, more hair gel, and tell everyone. Got it."

"Lisanna-"

"I'll do it, Laxus," she told him with a grin. Then, because she couldn't help herself, she reached up to touch his hair. "You know, I actually think it's more attractive this way."

Frowning, he called over to Mira, "Your sister's hitting on me out here, just so you know!"

"Good. She can have you."

"Mirajane-"

"It's not that nice," Lisanna said. "Pretty amateurish, if you ask me."

"Just go get Freed."

"Get Bickslow, go to dinner, and then show up with everyone in the guildhall to gawk at you. Check, check, and check."

"Lisanna-"

"I'm going," she groaned, turning back around.

"Do not bring your damn boyfriend here," he threatened. "Just Freed."

"Freed and Bickslow. Right."

"No Bickslow."

'Yes Bickslow."

"Lisanna-"

"Laxus, have I ever disobeyed you? Like, honestly?"

He just glared at her. "Get Freed and get back here as fast as you can."

"After dinner with Bickslow. Right."

"Lisanna!"

"Bye, Laxus."

"You better bring Freed back! I mean it!"

But she was gone then and it was back to just being him and the demon. With a sigh, he went to sit back down on the floor, his back pressed against the door once more.

"Mira," he called out softly after just resting for a moment or two. "I love you, demon. You know that. I just… You know that my hair means a lot to me and-"

"What about me, Laxus?"

"What about you?" Snorting, he said, "What? You want me to tell you how important you are to me or something?"

"Or something."

"I'm not going to, Mira. Not this time. You always do this. We fight and, no matter how wrong you are-"

"You told me that you hated me."

"You said the same thing to me!"

"In retaliation."

"Mira, just open the door. Huh? What are we, demon? Five?"

"Coming from the man that put a plastic bag over his head-"

"What? I'm just supposed to know everything there is in the world now?"

With a groan, Mira came over to unlock the door and slowly open it that time. She just stood in the doorway then, staring down at him.

"I'm sorry," he said, tilting his head back to look up at her. "Really sorry."

"No but?"

"No but."

"I'm sorry too. I… You're really serious about your hair and now you're going to have to shave it and… Sometimes I like to think that I can do things that I can't."

"I know, demon."

"I just got really excited. That you trusted me to do your hair. And then I screwed it up."

"It's okay."

"No, it's not, Laxus. I-"

"If I say that it's okay," he grumbled as he got to his feet. "Then it's okay. Okay?"

Laxus didn't know how Mirajane always did it. Honest, he didn't. It didn't matter that the whole thing was his fault. In the end, it was him comforting her and kissing her head. Him telling her that he wouldn't say stuff like that again and that their relationship meant so much to him that, well, what was hair, but something to be cut off anyways.

They were still making up too when the front door opened with a bang.

"Laxus, is it true?"

"Boss! Lissy says that you're looking stylish."

"What did that filthy woman do to you?"

"Real men don't throw fits over a damn haircut! And my sister isn't filthy, Ever!"

"I'm sorry, Laxus, but they were all together at the hall when I showed up.

Freed. Bickslow. Evergreen. Elfman. Lisanna.

Great. They were all together. Again. Sigh.

They all rushed to his side too, as he was still out in the hallway with Mirajane, who was glaring at Ever. The other woman was returning it pretty heavily too.

"What," Freed complained as he stared in shock at his idol, "happened?"

"The demon happened."

Elfman just stood at the end of the hall, arms crossed over his chest. "I think you look as much like a punk as you always do."

"Watch it, Elfboy," Laxus growled. "I'm already not in a very good mood."

"I think ya look great, boss," Bickslow said, giving him a thumbs up. "Don't he, babies?"

"Yes," they all crooned. "Boss, boss, boss!"

Lisanna nodded. "Mohawks are sexy."

"See? Lissy gets it," the seith agreed.

Freed took up with Evergreen's glaring at Mirajane who just used Laxus as a shield.

"He asked for it," she said. "Didn't you, Lax?"

"I asked for a haircut," he agreed. "And I really wanted pancakes-"

"Pancakes, huh?" Bickslow asked.

"It's some sort of sex thing," Lisanna whispered.

"Gross," Elfman grumbled.

"It is not," Mira told them with a frown. Evergreen didn't care what it was. Really, she didn't.

"How could you let her do this?" she asked as she came closer to lay a hand on the man's arm. "I mean, did she trick you?"

"In a way," Laxus said slowly. When his girlfriend huffed, he was quick to add, "But we've worked through it, so-"

"She defiled our idol," Freed said the before drawing his blade. In such a cramped space, he was lucky he didn't cut one of them. "She must be punished."

"Put it away, Freed," Laxus grumbled. "Before I shove it up your ass."

"I think he'd liked that," Bickslow whispered to Lisanna who elbowed him and snickered.

"He's right," Evergreen said. "Her hair must be cut in retribution."

"Laxus," Mira whispered, tugging on his arm then, as if for protection. "I-"

"Mira, you're stronger than both of them," he reminded. "Do you really think that they can force you to do anything?"

"No, but-"

"I resent that," Evergreen said.

"Mira's the manliest man around," Elfman reminded her. "So you should just accept it!"

"Why is he here again?" Laxus complained, looking to Lisanna.

"He does sorta live here, you know."

"Yeah, I know."

"I brought the razor," Freed said then. "And we will remedy this immediately."

"Right," Ever agreed. "By cutting Mira's hair off."

"Laxus," his girlfriend whined.

"Enough," he told his followers with a frown. "The demon didn't do anything wrong."

"Laxus did," Lisanna said then to which Bickslow nodded.

"The things we do for some dirty sex things, eh, boss?"

"They were actual damn pancakes, you idiots!"

"Touchy, touchy," Bickslow complained.

"For what it's worth," Lisanna went on, "I would keep the Mohawk. Don't you think, Mira? I mean, it's growing on me."

"Me too," she admitted. "I-"

"Hang on a second." Bickslow glanced suspiciously from Laxus to Lisanna. "You do this, boss, just to take my woman? 'cause I love you, I think of you as my brother-"

"Please, don't do either of those things. Really, just don't."

"-but Lissy's mine."

"I didn't do it for Lisanna, you numbskull. How many times do I have to say it was for pancakes-"

"Or really weird sex," Lisanna said.

Laxus just narrowed his eyes. "You're on thin ice here, kid."

"I'm not a kid!"

"You all are making my head hurt." Elfman turned then to walk off. "Just shave his head already and get it over with."

"No," Freed said. "I demand justice!"

"I get it now," Bickslow said, tongue falling from his mouth as he grinned. "You did it for me, boss!"

"Mira, find me that bag," he grumbled. "I think I'm just gonna suffocate myself and get this all over with."

"Laxus," she chided as he literally picked it up and started to put it over his head.

"Don't you see, Lissy?" Bickslow was looking to her then. "Laxus is immolating me!"

Ever frowned. "I think you mean emulating."

"That's what I said. Immolate."

"No," she said. "You're pronouncing-"

"I think you need to shut the hell up, on second thought, is what I think," Bickslow grumbled as Lisanna just patted his arm.

"It is emulate, Bicks," she whispered.

"Whatever! The point is that Ever and Freed just want Mira to pay because they're mad that I'm better than they are. Clearly, I am. I mean, even boss sees it. Right, boss?"

He just blinked. "I'd much rather immolate you, actually."

"Thank you."

"He said the other word, Bicks," Lisanna told him softly.

"Well, what does it mean?"

"Sacrifice you by setting you on fire or-"

"Hey! You just got real dark there, boss," he grumbled as with a frown. "I am a single father, you know."

"You're the one that brought the damn word up!"

"We are getting off track." Freed glared at Mirajane then. "We have formed some sort of a bond over the years, so I will take no pleasure in it."

"In what?" she asked. "You're not-"

"What must be done, must be done. It is that simple."

"I'll do it," Ever said as Mira just gave her a dark looked. "Happily."

"If it's that big of a deal," Elfman complained, glancing back at them. "Just shave my damn head."

"No one's shaving anyone's head," Laxus told them all. "Other than me. Freed, if you would please-"

"Wait, I vote for Elfman's head to be shaved," Evergreen said then, glancing over at the man. "Forget Mira."

"No one was touching her to begin with," Laxus said with a slight growl, though he was directing that more to Freed who smiled sheepishly in return. "At all. I mean it, guys. She'll kick your damn asses."

"Why do you want me to cut my hair?" Elfman was coming back to them then, reaching up to touch it. "I like it."

"I don't."

"It's manly!"

"It gets worse and worse with each passing day."

"This took another turn that I was not expecting." Bickslow moved to walk passed all of them and back out of the hallway. "And one that I don't care about. Come on, Freed! Time to shave the boss."

"Don't say it that way," Laxus grumbled as he shoved his way through the crowded hall too. "It's just my head."

"I could think of a few places that could use some shaving," Mira mumbled as Lisanna about choked before rushing after the others.

"Hurry, Freed," she agreed. "Come shave Laxus."

"Stop saying it like that! This is why I hate having you all here at once."

"Aw, boss. You know you love us. We're like family."

"You get closer and closer to immolation with every word."

"Even my sideburns, Ever?" Elfman asked as Mira and Freed hurried after the others, leaving them alone in the hall. "I mean, they're pretty manly, aren't they?"

"You're the one that brought it up," she told him as she came closer. "And, I mean, you have to admit, the longer it gets, the worse it looks."

"Why do I have to admit that? If it's not true."

"Elfman-"

"And I only offered to spare Mira."

"Honestly, Elf, did you really think that we were going to force your sister to shave her head? I mean, really?"

He just returned her look. "You and Freed? When it comes to Laxus? I'd believe anything."

"If he hadn't been around, maybe," she said as she thought it over. "He seems rather drawn to her."

"Unfortunate, isn't it?"

At least they agreed on something for once.

When they joined the others in the kitchen, they found Freed getting ready to shave Laxus' head.

"Wow," Bickslow said as he went to go peek in the sink. "There's a plate in here. And it's sticky. Maybe they were eating pancakes."

"Would you knock it off?" Laxus sounded plain defeated then. "I mean, seriously."

When it was all said and done, the man ended up with peach fuzz atop his head and, when he glanced in the mirror, it wasn't _horrible_. And it damn sure beat the Mohawk.

"This was a sad day," Bickslow told Lisanna with a sigh. "I mean, the boss tried to take you from me-"

"That never happened," Laxus and Mira both complained.

"-Ever never got immolated-"

"You cannot make that an everyday word," his female teammate complained. "You just can't."

"-and your brother cried like a baby over his hair. Sad, sad day."

Elfman, who was seated in the chair then where Laxus had sat before, just crouched over and hid his face in his hands.

"My hair was so manly!"

"Yeah," his girlfriend sighed, looking him over. "Seeing the after, I definitely liked the before."

"What?" More sobs. "You're not a man, Ever!"

"I never claimed to be."

Freed, who'd shaved Elfman's hair, frowned down at the man. "Get up. In an act of solidarity with you, Laxus, I will now let Mira do what she wishes with my hair."

"Really?" Mira, who'd been pretty down about the whole thing, perked right back up. "How fun."

"Demon," Laxus groaned, shaking his head at her. "No, Freed, you won't. And Elfman, crying isn't manly, no matter how many times you try to pass it off as it being. So knock it off! And Bickslow, get outta my sight. I'm done with you and your stupid girlfriend for the day."

"Oy, boss, you read my mind," he said with a nod. "Me and Lissy were gonna go out to dinner anyhow."

"Dinner?" Suddenly, Elfman's tears were all gone. Looking up, he said, "Dinner sounds good."

"You can't come," Lisanna said. "It's me, Bickslow, and the babies only."

"Only," the seith's dolls reiterated. "Only."

"What kinda man takes another man's sister out and won't even pay for his dinner?" Elfman raved, getting to his feet. "Huh?"

"Oh, great, now I'm paying for it too?" Bickslow made a face. "And no one invited you, Elfboy!"

"Hey," Laxus grumbled as Lisanna hit her boyfriend's arm. "Only I can call him that."

"So cute," Mira complimented as she went to get a broom and finally wipe up those hair clippings. "We can all go out to dinner. We-"

"Uh, Mirajane?" Freed came up to her then. "I know that I was rather brash with you before, but… Do you think perhaps I can have those hair clippings? At least the blond ones. I-"

"Sure, but why would you-"

"No," Laxus grumbled loudly. "He can't."

Evergreen just rolled her eyes. "Well, if we're going out to dinner, Bickslow, it better be somewhere nice."

"No one invited you guys," he said. "So-"

"I want steak," Mira told them then.

"No one invited you either, sis," Lisanna complained.

"Steak sounds good, demon," Laxus agreed.

"Well, if the boss wants to come," Bickslow said with a shrug. "I guess we can make an-"

"Bicks, seriously?"

"What, Lissy? The man just went through a trauma of having his hair hacked off!"

"Yeah, about that," she said, glancing at Laxus then. "Did you get the naughty stuff out of it or-"

"I hate you guys," he grumbled, turning to walk out of the kitchen.

"Go get your coat, dragon," Mirajane reminded as she kept sweeping. "It's cold out."

"Yeah, yeah."

Lisanna just made a face at her sister. "Thanks a lot, Mirajane. Elfman."

"You're welcome."

"All men help out their sisters."

"I wasn't being serious, guys!"

"Does that one have to come?" Freed asked, pointing at Lisanna. "She's rather loud."

She just stuck her tongue out at him as Bickslow said, "You're the odd man out here, man, so I'd watch it, huh?"

"Calm down, boys," Ever said as she went to go stand with Elfman. "And I was serious about going somewhere nice, Bickslow."

"You can go wherever you want. I'm taking Lissy, the boss, and the boss's boss out."

"Boss's boss." Mirajane giggled. "I like that."

"I think," Elfman said slowly, "that you might be out on your boss."

"What do you mean?" Bickslow asked.

"What do you mean?" his dolls repeated. "What do you mean?"

"Well," he said slowly, nodding towards the living room. "The front door just opened and closed and he's the only one not here, so-"

"What? Boss!" Bickslow was quick to grab Lisanna's hand before taking off running. "Come on, Lissy, we gotta catch him!"

"I would rather eat dinner just us, but-"

"We can make fun of him at the restaurant about his haircut as we wait for our food," he enticed.

"Laxus," she called then, breaking free of him and rushing from the house even faster. "Come back. We'll buy you steak!"

"You are not honestly going to make me run, are you?" Ever complained. Elfman just shrugged before moving to pick her up and throw her over his shoulder before taking off after the others. She beat at him though. "Elfman! But me down!"

"You said you didn't want to run," he pointed out.

"I didn't say I wanted to be carried though!"

When it was just Mira and Freed in the house, they finished sweeping up the hair clippings and, with a sigh, the man deposited them in the trash.

"Shall we go then?" he asked her. "After them?"

Nodding, she shocked him by hooking arms. "We're not chasing them though."

"I believe they are all long gone by now."

But when they got outside, they found Laxus there, cigar in mouth, standing out on the porch.

"How-" Mira started, but he shook his head.

"I came out here for a smoke," he said after one more puff. "Was at the side of the house, looking over that part of the fence you were so scared was gonna blow down, when I heard them all come runnin' out and stuff. Figured it was best to stay hidden. I can patch up the fence pretty easily, I think, too, by the way. And Freed?"

"Yes? Laxus?"

"Get your hands off my demon!"

"O-Of course, Laxus."

"Be nice, dragon," the woman warned as, after Freed release her arm, Laxus went to take his place. "And I thought I told you to stop smoking those? They stink."

"Chill out, demon." He blew some smoke away from her. "I'm dignified, yeah?"

"Are we going after the others?" Freed asked him then as they set off from the house.

"Course not," he grumbled, cigar dangling from his mouth as he spoke. "We're going somewhere else entirely. How could I possibly enjoy dinner with those animals?"

Mirajane just took a glance up at his shaved head. "Your hair looks nice, Lax. Even though you're being a horrible big brother right now."

"Ain't a damn one of them's big brother," he grumbled.

"And you know that we're totally going to go find them," she went on. "And eat all together. Because that's what we do."

Freed just sighed. "If we must."

"You don't take orders from her, numbnuts," Laxus grumbled. "What do you think this is?"

"Well," Mirajane said slowly. "I'm the boss's boss."

"The hell does that mean?"

"It means," Freed said with shake of his head. "That she managed to shave your head. Does anything else need to be said on the subject?"

"The day I get you to stop with these disgusting cigars will be the real win," Mirajane complained as Laxus took another puff. "I mean, honestly."

"Dignified."

"Cancer-ridden."

"Bald," Freed offered. "Practically."

Of course they went to find the others. And of course, they went out to eat with them and, shocking, Mirajane made Laxus foot the bill. Because, after all, he was the big brother.

Where was that plastic bag when you needed it…

"So, boss," Bickslow whispered as they walked out of the restaurant, him hanging back to speak with the man. "Me and Lissy'll be going home together tonight, I figure."

"The hell do I want to know that for?"

"Well…you gonna tip me off, huh? What are these pancakes, eh?"

Frowning, Laxus thought for a moment before saying, "Well, it's basically putting a plastic bag over your head for hours."

"Really?"

"Ye-"

"Laxus," he heard Mira reprimand from where she was walking with her sister. With a frown back at him, she said, "Behave."

What was the point, huh? Of being a big brother? If you can't even have any fun once in awhile?

"Has it occurred to anyone," Freed spoke up as they walked along, all soon to go their separate ways, no doubt, and leave him alone, "that this was all Ever's fault?"

"What are you talking about? I don't care what pancakes are or what they do with them."

"For the last time, they're just pancakes!" Laxus growled.

"She clearly planned it all," her teammate went on. "Now Elfman and Laxus are sporting the same haircut. That sort of coincidence has her written all over it."

"Ha ha," Laxus grumbled. "We do not… Damn it, Freed! Why didn't you mention it before?"

"I just noticed!"

"It's growing on me," Elfman said as he ran a hand over it. "Thanks, Ever."

"I didn't do this," she complained. "I mean, I made you get yours cut, but-"

"He has go shave it all now," Laxus told them all. "I'm serious. Bald. You have to, Elfman."

"No way!"

"You guys are so cute as twins," Lisanna snickered.

"Leave him alone, guys," Mirajane sighed, having to hold back and go stand with her boyfriend. "I don't think Laxus can take much more tonight."

Pancakes. Some damn pancakes. That's all he wanted. But it hadn't been worth it. Not at all.

"Poor, dragon. You want another cigar?"

"I want my hair back, demon."

"I can't give you that," she said as she patted at his arm. "But-"

"She can give you pancakes."

"Damn it, Bickslow," the man growled. "I-"

"Time to go, Lissy." The man took off into a sprint again. "Now."

He grabbed her by the arm as he passed, his babies running too. And Lisanna just giggled as Freed gave chase.

"Come back! Laxus commanded it!"

"No way, Freed. Leave us alone!"

"It is Laxus' command!"

And Evergreen, knowing that without them there as a distraction, Laxus would take his aggression out on Elfman, took him by the arm and drug him around the first corner they came to, calling out over her shoulder how thankful she was for dinner.

Then there were two.

"Demon?"

"Hmmm?" Mirajane had both of her arms wrapped around one of his then and was staring up at him with a smile.

"We gotta get a new family."

"Mmmm…no. I think I'm pretty keen on this one."

Yeah. Even though he'd never say it, so was he.

* * *

 **BRSxANE requested this, based off that chapter cover where Mira gives Laxus a hair cut, and you guys know that I can't resist the Strauss siblings and the Thunder Legion all together. They just all belong with one another. Swear.**


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